{"id":171,"date":"2008-11-14T13:59:39","date_gmt":"2008-11-14T17:59:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/antipaucity.com\/2008\/11\/14\/univacky\/"},"modified":"2008-11-14T13:59:39","modified_gmt":"2008-11-14T17:59:39","slug":"univacky","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/merikebi.warrenmyers.com\/?p=171","title":{"rendered":"univacky"},"content":{"rendered":"

an oldy, but a goody… http:\/\/www.fourmilab.ch\/documents\/univac\/univacky.html<\/a><\/p>\n

(For proper rhythm, the symbol \u201c@\u201d is pronounced \u201cat\u201d and \u201c$\u201d is pronounced \u201cdollar\u201d.)<\/p>\n

‘Twas BRKPT and the I\/O queue
\nWas SYMMING FASTRAND like the wind.
\nAll idle was the CAU
\nAs the last run had just FINNED.<\/p>\n

“Beware the UNIVAC, my son,
\nIts FASTRAND and its high-speed drum,
\nAnd FIELDATA, and listen for
\nThe CTMC’s hum.”<\/p>\n

He quickly dialed a low-speed line
\nAnd then keyed in his SITE-ID.
\nHe typed @RUN and then sat back
\nTo wield his CRT.<\/p>\n

NO ACTIVE RUN, it answered back,
\nAnd WAITING ON FACILITY;
\nBAD STATUS WORD FROM CSF,
\nAnd then just SYMB 03.<\/p>\n

“I’ll fix you now,” he shouted out,
\n“You’ve finally got me ired.
\nI’ll use a systems terminal:
\n1200 baud, hard-wired!”<\/p>\n

“I’ll write a loop in SSG
\nTo make your ferrite holler
\n1000 runs, and in each one
\nTen ER’s to FORK$.”<\/p>\n

“Each fork,” he smiles, “@ADDs 10 files,
\nEach file starts 10 runs more.
\nEach run contains 10 COBOL jobs
\nTo grind along in core.<\/p>\n

“Each job will write 10 9-track tapes,
\nAnd then rewind and read them.
\nEach tape, of course, is punched to cards,
\nFor backup, if I need them.”<\/p>\n

As fast as light his fingers write:
\n@SETC, then @TEST, @JUMP,
\n@XQT, and then for spite,
\nA full post-mortem dump.<\/p>\n

He wiped his hands upon his shirt
\nAnd then he FINNED his run,
\nAnd scurried to the console
\nTo sit and watch the fun.<\/p>\n

MEMORY FAULT, the system cried,
\nAnd PARITY-07 ADG,
\nAnd PANIC DUMP IMPOSSIBLE,
\nAnd ERROR 53.<\/p>\n

“Oh frabjous day, callou callay;
\nI’ve made the system stall.”
\nHe tore it from the PAGEWRITER
\nAnd hung it on the wall.<\/p>\n

‘Twas BRKPT and the I\/O queue
\nWas SYMMING FASTRAND like the wind.
\nAll idle was the CAU
\nAs the last run had just FINNED.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

an oldy, but a goody… http:\/\/www.fourmilab.ch\/documents\/univac\/univacky.html (For proper rhythm, the symbol \u201c@\u201d is pronounced \u201cat\u201d and \u201c$\u201d is pronounced \u201cdollar\u201d.) ‘Twas BRKPT and the I\/O queue Was SYMMING FASTRAND like the wind. All idle was the CAU As the last run had just FINNED. “Beware the UNIVAC, my son, Its FASTRAND and its high-speed drum, …
Continue reading univacky<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_hide_featured_image":false,"_jetpack_featured_image_duplicate_dismissed":0,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[16,21,37],"tags":[],"keyring_services":[],"class_list":["post-171","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fun","category-humor","category-reprint"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/merikebi.warrenmyers.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/171","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/merikebi.warrenmyers.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/merikebi.warrenmyers.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/merikebi.warrenmyers.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/merikebi.warrenmyers.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=171"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/merikebi.warrenmyers.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/171\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/merikebi.warrenmyers.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=171"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/merikebi.warrenmyers.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=171"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/merikebi.warrenmyers.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=171"},{"taxonomy":"keyring_services","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/merikebi.warrenmyers.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fkeyring_services&post=171"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}